The Role of the Father is Under Attack and It Is Hurting Our Children

The role of the Father is under attack and it is hurting our children!

I know we have all heard (in movies or in person) women talking about how the father of their children is worthless.  We may also know of people that complain about the father of their children to their children. There is even a song called “Daddy Ain’t S***”.

Dad’s are under attack and it is one of the most detrimental things that is happening to our culture and to our children.

It may seem that there are many fathers that are not a part of their children’s lives.  It does not matter whether they be absent from the home or present.

Also, there are many single mothers that are working hard trying to raise their children by themselves. I don’t know how they do it, but they do what needs to be done and that is to be respected and commended.

No matter what the situation, for the benefit of the little eyes that are watching, the little ears that are listening and the little minds that are taking everything in, we have to make sure that we are not tearing down what it means to be a father.

Fathers have a critical role in a child’s development.

They teach their children so much that a mom cannot even if she has the best intentions.

Fathers and Boys

Fathers help young boys understand what it means to be a man. They help their sons understand the roles and responsibilities of a man in the household. Fathers help their sons develop the correct self-image of what a father needs to be.  They show them the love needed, the correction needed, the guidance needed, to be an example in a child’s life.

A boy learns from his father, without even realizing he’s doing it, what a man is and does. He learns about masculinity, about what men like and don’t like. Many adult men report that they either wanted to be “just like my dad”—or wanted to be his exact opposite. Fathers undoubtedly have a powerful influence on their growing sons, and it begins from the moment of birth.

So when the role of the father is under attack or a son’s father is degraded in front of him, we are telling that young boy that being a father is not important.  We are saying that women and families don’t need men, don’t need THEM.

Fathers and Girls

But Fathers don’t just influence boys, they also have a great influence on daughters.

Young girls who have a warm, close relationship with their dads are better able to handle everyday stressors, are less prone to depression and anxiety, and are better able to talk about their feelings, according to a study published in the Journal of Family Psychology.

Also, for most girls, their father is the first man they will ever love. This plays a significant role in how they will look at love from every other man. A father’s love helps validates her worth and her humanity and dignity.

Fathers show how a woman that a man should love them for who they are not as a sexual object. If girls don’t have that example it is very easy for them to assume that the only love between a man and a woman is a sexual kind of love.

When the role of the father is under attack or a daughter’s father is under attack in front of her, we are also teaching her to not respect and honor that role in her household.  We are taking away the God-given headship that a man has in his family.

When girls learn this as they are children, they are able to understand their role as a wife, honor their husband’s, and teach their children that same principle to build healthy relationships.

Read 3 Reasons We Should Pray for Our Children

Fathers and God

Most important of all, when the role of the father is under attack, it will impact how they view God.

In the Bible, there are so many scriptures that compare God’s love with the love of a Father. Matthew 7:9-11 and Luke 11:11-13 talks about how if our earthly fathers know how to give good gifts to their children, then how much more will our father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask.

Psalm 103:13 compares the compassion of God with the compassion of a father to their children.

In Proverbs 3:11-12 and Hebrews 12:7-11, it says that God corrects and disciplines us because he loves us just as a father disciplines and corrects his children because he loves them.

If we destroy the role of the father, then no one will be able to truly understand how God deals with us and loves us. It will be much harder to receive the love of God in their lives.  And that will have an eternal impact.

So what can we do?

First of all, we need to stop belittling the role of the father in our children’s eyes.  The image of the father is under attack and we shouldn’t contribute to that situation. Regardless of shortcomings, we should respect the role of father.  Children should learn the proper role of a father and this is much more difficult if they have a negative narrative portrayed before them.

Also, we have to be proactive in finding someone to fill that role in a child’s life if the father is absent.  Yes, ideally it would be the child’s biological father, but if it can’t be, how about an uncle, a grandfather, a pastor, a teacher?  Whoever can be a father figure that can teach them what a true father should be.  So that the boys have something to strive to be and the girls have an example of what a good man and father is.

Another important way to restore the role of the father in our society is by finding ways to honor the men and fathers that are in a child’s life.  Show your kids how to honor those men by being respectful.  Find ways to include those fathers and father figures in activities, decisions, and the lives of the children. Find ways to make fathers feel special on Father’s Day and every day.

The impact of fathers in the lives of children is too important to ignore.